So happy you stopped by.
Lauren was a beautiful, classy, professional and I got my life together kind a lady. You know the type? Well you wouldn’t know it to see her but she was stuck in a love hope addiction. Which is basically layman terms for I know I should get out but I’m hoping he will change soon predicament. You cycle… I can’t stand this….I must get out and you start making plans and then he does something, says something and a ray of hope lights up in your heart. We dwell on it for days, hoping he’ll say it again, do it again but he doesn’t. Yet we keep hoping.
I see this so often with my clients. They feel miserable inside, they know they need to make a decision, do something different but they don’t move. They don’t move out of fears like… ‘what if I leave and THEN he changes? What if he’s different with his next relationship, I will have lost out. If I just do this……, he will love me again, love me more etc etc.
I know ….heartbreaking. I’m tired of seeing amazing women like you give away your power!!
We all want love, to be loved and to give love, freely easily, joyfully. Tons of research shows us that strong relationships are big factors responsible for health, longevity, overall success and fulfillment, and even financial success.
The question is, does our pursuit for love…keep us stuck even when the love is not healthy?
And love is really not that hard to get. What is harder to achieve is healthy love. We just weren’t taught how to do that well. We are lucky if we have had good role models while growing up but for most of us, some element of non-functioning was very present and it shaped our views and habits on love.
Here’s what you need to ask yourself…
1) Does this relationship make me feel expansive MOST of the times?
2) Or do I feel constricted?
3) Am I obsessing over all kinds of things all the time or am I content and peaceful, do I feel emotionally SAFE?
4) Am I myself when I’m around him?
5) Do I feel cherished by him?
If not, how long has this been going on? Be honest… we all go into places of denial to ward off pain. Yet the more honest you can be with yourself, the closer your courage is available to you to make the changes you really need to make.